Individuals living with addiction often push their loved ones away, which can cause significant harm to their relationships. Healing and building a healthy support system is a critical part of the recovery process. To repair relationships, people often need to make a living amends.
Amends Versus Apologies
Thank you, Living Amends, for the scholarship and for investing in my success. If we had not done the work in the first eight steps, we wouldn’t now have a foundation on which to stand while we make our amends. If we had not developed a relationship with a Higher Power, we wouldn’t now have the faith and trust that we definitely need to work Step Nine!
When You Don’t Actually Know the Affected Person
It won’t be easy, and you’ll alcoholism likely feel waves of regret washing over you. This can be a sign that you’re working on your sense of morality. To learn more about addiction recovery, including AA, reach out to Silver Mist Recovery.
Step 9: The Best 5 Tips for Living Amends
According to Alcoholics Anonymous, living amends occur when you decide to “live out” the changes you have agreed to in your recovery journey. These are long-term actions or steps you take to drug addiction treatment show you are completely committed to recovery. There is much for you to be proud of as you approach the three-quarter mark of your recovery steps, but these can feel like precarious steps. The 9th Step is a crucial and transformative part of the recovery journey in Alcoholics Anonymous. It requires more than just a simple apology; it involves taking concrete actions to rectify past wrongs and demonstrating a commitment to change.
Sometimes, making direct amends to someone may lead to further harm. For example, if you are estranged from a loved one and they will not see you, your indirect amends may involve reflecting on and modifying the behaviors that led to the estrangement. Today I am working on (the behaviors noted above) by ___________________. If there’s anything I can do today to make things right, please let me know. My only goal right now is to acknowledge the harm I caused and do what I can to make amends, if that’s possible. As a part of my recovery process, I have reflected on my behavior and realized that I have hurt you in the past though my___________.
The Ninth Step Promises
- Thorough preparation ensures your actions align with your intentions and positively contribute to your recovery journey and the relationships you are trying to mend.
- When you find step 9 AA insight, you learn that the goal is restoration, not perfection.
- In the second month, if they reapply and successfully are awarded the second month’s rent, the resident will pay 50% of the rent.
- The steps ensure that those in recovery feel supported, safe, and secure in making the next step to freedom from addiction.
Instead, making amends means you apologize for what you’ve done and make it right. Similarly, making living amends means you completely change the way you live and remain committed to that lifestyle. Engaging in the process of making amends can be a profoundly transformative experience for individuals in recovery. An important element of step nine is that those in recovery have already begun making amends to themselves by changing some of their behaviors, attitudes, and beliefs. The goal of this step is to find freedom by cleaning up the past to live peacefully in the present. Those in recovery are encouraged to keep an ongoing ninth step in their life by continuing to pay off debts and refraining from lying, stealing, or cheating.
Navigating the Process of Making Amends in Recovery
Your role is to do what you can to repair harm and then let go of any control over the response. This detachment helps protect your sobriety by focusing on personal responsibility rather than external validation. I will be applying to jobs in the treatment field in the coming months as I continue to gain more time as a sober woman.
- I let him decide if he wants to do laundry at midnight or wear dirty clothes.
- I don’t take it for granted, and I will continue to pay it forward.
- Living Amends is a non-profit organization supporting those serious about sobriety by trusting God, cleaning house and helping others.
- I plan to continue applying for nursing jobs and hope to find employment in the recovery field or in wellness work.
Making direct amends requires face-to-face interactions wherever possible, which shows sincerity, openness, and humility. These interactions are essential in rebuilding trust and promoting healing for both parties involved. However, it’s equally important to recognize when making living amends amends might cause further harm.